In order to consolidate our Eye Candy coverage, we’ve developed a new feature: Unwrapped! We’ll take all the new photoshoots from the week and grade (or “brand”) each based on the following criteria:
• Poses (are they versatile or just glorified statues?)
• Uniqueness (have we seen this photoshoot a billion times before?)
Grading scale: Sweet (Great)/Bland (Iffy)/Sour (Awful)
Jillian‘s Seven Year Itch
Appearance: This is obviously a Halloween-themed shoot, as Jillian’s wearing the famous white dress that Marilyn Monroe wore in “The Seven Year Itch”, along with the iconic Marilyn hairstyle and her signature beauty mark. I can’t say that Jillian wears it as well as Marilyn did, but it’s an amusing costume. I still prefer her electric guitar costume, though.
Uniqueness: Everyone and their mother has “paid tribute” to Marilyn, and this is one of her most famous images, so it’s not anything that hasn’t been seen a million times.
Grade: Bland. It’s cute for a Halloween shoot, but other than that, it’s just another Marilyn Monroe impression, and it’s not even a very good one at that.
• Click to see the rest of the photoshoot.
Michelle McCool‘s Linked Up
Appearance: A gray racerback top and black pants–both shredded in some way– are nice, but don’t look that great together. Her hair is something odd, too, but I can’t explain it. The chain seems random too, and kind of looks like she stole it off of a bicycle. None of it seems to go together well, even though they’re all shooting for a “tough” look.
Poses: Michelle seems intent on selling her heel persona through serious glares at the camera, and not much else. They don’t look intimidating at all–more like she’s tired.
Uniqueness: Michelle hasn’t altered her poses much, even though her “tough girl” glares need some work.
Grade: Bland. Even though she’s wearing ripped clothing and sporting an actual chain, it comes off as incredibly boring.
• Click to see the rest of the photoshoot.
Rosa‘s Fringe Benefits
Appearance: A simple black top and matching fringed skirt aren’t very adventurous, but the sheer portion of the top and fringe at the bottom of the skirt make it just interesting enough, and the shoes are extraordinary. She takes what could be a bland all-black ensemble and takes it to the next level.
Poses: Rosa tosses a few smiles our way, which is an improvement from her usual stony, serious faces. She chooses a nice variety of poses that still keep a relaxed mood, but are far from dull.
Uniqueness: Rosa’s smiling! That’s breaking news, folks.
Grade: Sweet. The whole shoot is simple, yet *just* interesting enough. Rosa shows that you don’t have to go all out to make a photoshoot sexy.
• Click to see the rest of the photoshoot.
Read more to see the rest of this week’s photoshoots and vote for your favorite.
Savannah‘s All That Glitters
Appearance: A sparkly tank top takes center stage over black shorts and boots. It’s cute and not overdone, as the black allows the sparkling top to take the attention without a fight.
Poses: Savannah’s not showing much charisma in her photoshoots lately, and this is not exception. She poses around chairs and switches it up a bit, but there’s nothing truly interesting about them. She just lacks a certain spark.
Uniqueness: Savannah is sticking to the formula she’s developed so far, but hopefully she’ll expand on it soon.
Grade: Bland. Like I said, the clothes are nice, but she lacks a certain spark to make it interesting.
• Click to see the rest of the photoshoot.
Tiffany‘s On the Mend
Appearance: Tiffany’s wearing a very simple black dress and shoes, but it’s not that that catches the attention–she’s also wearing a cast on her left arm, in keeping with the current storyline that suggests that she was in a car accident and broke her arm. I must say, she looks stunning even with the wrapped up arm, but it still looks pretty awkward in the setting. At least she kept the rest of her outfit simple.
Poses: There’s not really much you can do with one good arm, and Tiffany does what she can. It just doesn’t make for a very interesting shoot with a dozen shots of her folding her arms.
Uniqueness: Most Divas skip the shoots when they’re injured–kayfabe or not–so I suppose Tiffany deserves points for that.
Grade: Bland. There’s not much you can do with a cast, photoshoot-wise, so she probably could have skipped the shoot until she was fully healed. It just looks a little goofy at first glance.
• Click to see the rest of the photoshoot.
Now that you’ve gotten our perspective, which photoshoot did you like best? Vote in the poll below and sing your song in the comments!
NOTE ON TNA PHOTOSHOOTS – I tend to only cover photoshoots with a decent amount of photos. So if TNA has a new shoot with Tara, but there’s only 3 photos, I’m going to skip it. No hard feelings. But if you see any new, sizable TNA shoots feel free to drop us a tweet and let us know–it’s tough to keep track of their new stuff!
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