Friday, December 20, 2024

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NXT Redux (April 10th, 2014): Who Knew Bayley Could Speak Punjabi?

What’s up Diva fans and welcome to this week#s NXT Redux. Many thanks to the hilarious Bobby for taking over last week and and blowing my articles out of the water. The thanks I get for giving him some spotlight, him upstaging me. HOW BLOODY RUDE! Just kidding of course! Thanks again, Mr Burchill! Don’t worry readers, he’s not the incestuous pirate kind!

Moving swiftly on from that bizarre reference, we move onto NXT, which features a pairing between a petite firecracker and insanely tall and strange gentleman. And no, I’m not talking about the BFFs. You’ll see what I mean later on when Bayley is backstage with Devin Taylor. Bayley is also competing again this week, as the Doctor of Huganomics takes on one third of the BFFs, Sasha Banks.

TO THE VIDEO!

Out first this week, complete with new Disney-esque titantron font, it’s “IT’S BAYLEY”! I love It’s Bayley, she’s a sweet girl. Oh wait, you mean that’s not her name. I feel horrendously fooled by Byron Saxton and now Eden, how dare they give me that impression! Seriously though, why do they say that for Bayley and no-one else?

Out next, flanked by Charlotte, it’s the ghetto fabulous (as if I just used that phrase!) Sasha Banks. Of course, Summer‘s head on a stick is present too. FYI, I definitely think Summer needs to return by the next set of taping. She needs to be written out so Alexa Bliss can be the next devilish Diva in the BFFs!

The match starts with the hellcat Sasha on the offense. This girl is aggressive! She trips Bayley at the ankles and goes for the first cover of the contest within seconds. She then wrenches Baylz with a side headlock before knocking her to the floor with a shoulder block. She goes for a second lightning quick cover yet comes up short for the second time. Sasha starts to look frustrated already (she’s bound to be with all the losses she’s piling up!) yet she manages to keep her cool and she whips her hug-loving foe into the corner. Bayley responds with a counter to Sasha’s next move, yet Sasha reverses that reversal and mounts Bayley, bagging another near fall. An irate and ratchet Miss Banks continues her assault, clubbing Bayley like she just found out Santa Clause isn’t real for the first time and Bayley is the nearest soft object to take her frustrations out on. (Apologies to any readers under 12 years old. I just ruined ‘The Talk’ for you. Oops.)

Sasha Fierce (see what I did there?) keeps hammering Bayley, viciously ramming her face into the mat. She works over Bayley some more, thrashing her face first into the mat, throwing her across the ring by her hair, stomping a mudhole in her in the corner and crushing her with a straight jacket-style submission, all with a few pin attempts thrown in for desperate good measure. Bayley eventually fights her way out after being thrown back down once yet lightning doesn’t strike twice in this instance. Bayley reverses a scoop slam and the comeback is on!

Bayley connects with a pair of axe handles before laying into Sasha with a corner clothesline. She follows these strikes up with two spinning elbows; one from a running position and another from the second rope. She tries for another running assauly yet Sasha sticks her boot up. After a tussle in the corner, Sasha comes off best, locking in the straight jacket hold. It looks like she might be trying for her submission, which I believe is called the Bank Job, yet as she hasn’t used it in so long, I really can’t remember in the slightest! Either way, the wait to see it again continues, as Bayley reverses the hold and hits the Belly-to-Bayley for the win! Note to the new commentator: it’s called Belly-to-Bayley not Bayley-to-Belly. Rookie!

Later in the night, Dev Taylor is backstage with… The Great Khali. Forgive me if my typing here is dodgy, I’m trying to do this plus throw up in the sick bag to my right. And we thought Natalya always being on NXT was bad? Khali speaks some form of English before Bayley comes up and gives him a hug. CJ Parker and his new heel bad self then talk some more garbage I don’t care about (garbage is an appropriate choice of word as I think the conversaton was about waste). Khali spouts more rubbish before Bayley hilariously declares she can speak Punjabi and lucky for us, Khali will be back next week. Woo?

Thoughts: WWE, I love Bayley. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD KEEP HER AWAY FROM KHALI! I’ll admit, the part where she said she knew Punjabi was absolutely hilarious yet still, I don’t want to see her become a manager to him.

Onto the match, it was pretty uneventful, yet I did like Sasha’s attitude and her consistent pin attempts. This to me shows that her character knows she can’t take Bayley lightly after being cocky in several other matches only to end up flat on her back down for the count. Character progression, me likey – even if I’m the one inventing it!

One little gripe though, what happened to Bayley and Charlotte despising each other? The story has been watered down massively for me. It’s gone from a really decent plot point to the BFFs just being nasty to everyone in general. A little bit more focus on Charlotte and Bayley before either of them step up to Paige would be nice to see.

And with that, stay tuned, Jack will be back!

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