Tuesday, November 5, 2024

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Survivor Series in Review: A Hot Mess

Okay, so I know I’ve said this before but it has never been more fitting as a life motto than it is tonight. If you don’t have anything nice to say, THEN DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL. Sadly, it isn’t always easy to abide by that especially when my job is that of a Redux writer. Survivor Series was a hot mess, to say the least, and trust me, that’s me being super duper kind. I don’t like to litter the world with negativity and hate because there’s so much of that anyway, so to get us started tonight I’m going to focus on the positive things.

Tonight on Survivor Series we were treated to a seven-on-seven Diva Tag Team match with traditional Survivor Series rules. As I said back on Monday, this match could go one of two ways. Team ‘True’ Divas (which is the dumbest name in the history of names seeing as how most of those women have similar backgrounds), AJ Lee, Tamina Snuka, Kaitlyn, Summer Slae, Alicia Fox, Aksana and Rosa Mendes, took on Team Total Divas, which was a team basically comprised of the seven cast members. For Redux purposes and my word count, Team TD is comprised of Natalya, Brie and Nikki Bella, Cameron and Naomi, Eva Marie, and the other one that’s never on television. Just kidding, of course! By the time the show was all said and done, it was the one who is never on television, Miss JoJo, that ended up with the fans chanting her name. But I’m totes getting ahead of myself.

Anyway!

The match could end up being the greatest thing this world has ever seen or, on the flip side, it could be the worst thing ever. I know what my opinion of it is but here’s a chance for you guys to be the judge.

I’ll be brutally honest when I say that I thought the promo was going to be the worst thing I saw all night. I wasn’t really impressed with AJ at the beginning because I thought she was talking to herself, but when it was revealed that the rest of her team happened to be standing there, I started to get it. In her backwards way of motivating them, AJ managed to turn their animosity towards her around on the Total Divas girls and that was basically the lead in to the match.

I could have gone my entire life without ever having lived in a world were Aksana pins Brie and Rosa pins Cameron, but unfortunately that didn’t work out for me. That happened, along with Nikki and Summer having a dance off which ended when Nikki busted out the worm. I really have no words. What I will say is that the most compelling part of the match ended up being JoJo. We have yet to see her step inside the ring on Raw, and for most of the match she just stood there on the outside of the ring. Nikki was the one who tagged her in towards the end and it was only fitting that she went against the powerhouse Tamina. JoJo bumped extremely well in her main roster debut and for a moment, I thought she would end up getting a shock elimination on Tamina. It didn’t work out and Tamina tagged in AJ to make the pin.

Part of me feels like I’m going to end up liking JoJo away from Total Divas. She is super young and that’s an automatic strike against her. She can’t help her age and she can’t help the way she has been protrayed on the show (spoiled little brat), but she can let her work ethic and in-ring performances speak for her, and she has time on her side. JoJo has many, many years ahead of her should she choose to stay in this business and I’m curious to see how far she can go. The great Kelly Kelly, the best Diva of all time, made her debut at the tender age of 19 and went on to become the first female to ever defend the World Heavyweight Championship. Now she’s living the good life as a hockey WAG, slaying the world with her hot brunette hair. Sounds like an amazing life to me and JoJo already has a very good pedigree!

The match itself ended as most of us thought it would. Team Total Divas ended up getting the win when Natalya got the submission on AJ. Natalya and Nikki were the sole survivors for their team, and shame on me for picking the wrong Bella. I can only assume that Natalya will get another title shot, and I can only pray that we never see a hot mess like this again. Overall, I definitely give the match a 2 out of 5… and the two is because I loved the Funkadactyls ring gear and Nikki getting a chance to have a little bit of the spotlight Brie has embraced the past few months.

It wasn’t a total bust and I don’t want to be a complete Debbie Downer. Some positives can be taken away such as another potential AJ/Natalya match, perhaps the insertion of Nikki into the title picture, and JoJo having a positive debut. It just sucks because after seeing the opening match featuring the guys and Roman Reigns being the sole survivor, the Divas never really got a chance. Such is life.

Thankfully Total Divas was on tonight and saved the day. Check back for that Redux soon! =)

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