Welcome to a new feature here at Diva Dirt, the concept of which you may recognise from The Late Show with David Letterman. In every episode of The Late Show, Letterman has a satirical ‘top ten’, that combined with the recently published “20 Rules for the Diva Afterlife” gave us an idea! Check back every week for Diva Dirt’s Letterman-esque Weekly Top 10!
Top 10 Things You’d Never Hear in a Diva Promo
10. “I’m really a man!”
9. “I’m gon’ cut a bitch!”
8. “Please, you can keep your title… just don’t hurt me again!”
7. “If I could quote Shakespeare for a moment…”
6. “Randy Orton threatened to defecate in my bag if I didn’t mention his name at least once during this promo.”
5. “We decided against having a match tonight, we thought a bikini contest would better solve our issues.”
4. “I know most of you will use my match for a pee break, so I’ve decided to use it for a pee break too.”
3. “I hate to admit this, but Batista’s started writing his next book so…”
2. “Vince promised if I slept with him, I could cut this promo. Here I am…”
1. “Oh crap, I think I just got my period.”
