Monday, November 4, 2024

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WWE Main Event Redux (May 6th, 2014): Trouble in ‘Total Divas’ Paradise?

What’s up Diva fans and welcome to this week’s WWE Main Event Redux. We have a little change of pace this week on Main Event as after weeks of Paige destroying opponents in singles competition and Emma and Layla competing in 48 second pointless mixed tags, we got a refreshing six Diva tag on Main Event. It’ll be a battle of Total Divas and True Divas as Cameron, Naomi and Natalya take on Aksana, Alicia Fox and Tamina Snuka. Can Tamina rebound from her unsuccessful Extreme Rules title challenge or will the trio known as “Funky Dungeon” bag the win? Hashtag that shizz! #FunkyDungeonFanatic

TO THE VIDEO!

After a graphic of what’s coming up on this week’s SmackDown that nobody will watch, we see that the Heel Divas are already in the ring. Alicia Fox’s music is playing so clearly, following Tamina’s loss, she really is at the bottom of the barrel again. Womp womp. The Total Divas are out next, with Natalya and The Funkadactyls coming out to Natalya’s music and some horrendous announcing from Tony Chimel.

Nattie and ‘Lic start the match, with Natalya getting a stiff kick to the gut from Alicia. Speaking of guts, Alicia’s stomach is looking TONED. Dayum! Alicia whips, leapfrogs and flip headscissors Natalya and yet again, Alicia is showing how impressive she really is. Shame WWE don’t give a monkeys. Trying not to be outdone, Natalya fights back with some knees, a nice hip toss and her sweet basement dropkick where she runs on her opponent beforehand. My neck hurts just typing about it!

Alicia’s back is nearly hurting as Nat goes for the Sharpshooter, yet the cunning A. Fox makes it to the ropes and to the outside. Natalya follows her out yet Alicia jumps back in the squared circle to try and take advantage. Nattie’s veteran instincts kick in and she avoids an elbow attempt from Alicia yet she then does the complete opposite. She makes a major rookie mistake by getting distracted by Tamina, which allows Alicia to practically kick her cheek off!

Back in the ring and Alicia gets a two count. The commentators then discuss how Natalya is perhaps distracted due to Cameron losing her cat on Total Divas, yet that happened weeks ago! Their point is flawed because as far as we know, there hasn’t been any recent pussy trouble! Alicia has temporarily had enough of beating Nattie’s ass, so she gives Aksana a go. The pair hit their Foxsana double team in the corner, which garners Aksana a one count.

Everyone’s favorite Raspberry Ripple then tags in Tamina, who works Nattie over with headbutts until Natalya slips into a schoolgirl out of nowhere. After a two count, Tamina retaliates with a stiff clothesline. After another near fall, Aksana gets back into the fray and tries to act sexy in the middle of the ring. She then wallops the taste and probably some teeth out of Natalya’s mouth with some brutal forearms. Aksana then gets another two count after she pulls Natalya from the corner by her legs yet again. Following a tight chinlock, Aksana throws a battered and bruised Tal back to the mat just as she was mounting a comeback.

Next, Aksana hilariously taunts Naomi by tapping her knee. Logically, you think she would think to maybe try and hit that knee again. Well, you though wrong. Aksana missed an elbow drop yet she still manages to stop Nattie from making the tag. Tamina ignores the referee’s orders and gets in the ring as the heels club Natalya in their corner. Frantically, Natalya pushes her way towards getting a tag, yet it’s still not enough. Natalya then whacks her arse in Aksana’s stomach and it’s enough to wind the Lithuanian and make the tag to Naomi!

Naomi let’s her body-y-y-y-y do what it wanna do, do, do, do, do, do, do as she nails consecutive dropkicks, a kip up, a European uppercut and a flip clothesline. She then nails Aksana with a slightly more choreographed version of the spike middle rope facebuster that she used during the WrestleMania match. Naomi the dropkicks both Alicia and Tamina to the floor before hitting a lackluster Rear View. The bad girls try to get back in the ring yet the face Divas clear house, allowing Naomi to hit her split legged moonsault on Aksana.

Following the match, Cameron gets her sass on a very upset Natalya confronts her. DUN DUN DUN!

Thoughts: Really nice match between these six! I’ll firstly address Naomi, who other than her Rear View, looked very impressive. She was in there like “I don’t care at all, I’m just going to dispose of you other messes and get out of here.” She seemed hilariously nonchalant and I actually strangely enjoyed it.

Another person who is VERY hit and miss to me who I enjoyed this time around was Aksana. Her taunting was fun, her chemistry with Natalya was on-point and he moves were impactful and fluid. Still think she dances like she had an accident needing the toilet though.

Alicia Fox, of course was incredibly competent and Tamina did well too. Natalya’s selling wasn’t too over-the-top this time either and she played the Diva in distress very well! Cameron executed her one dropkick well too LOL.

As for the aftermath, it was pretty strange and short yet Cameron and Natalya performed well. There was a brief moment of them staring down earlier in the match yet the camera hardly caught it sadly. The problem I have with this is they are bickering over something that happened months ago in real life. Chronologically, WWE need to be consistent.

I’m looking forward now to seeing Alicia Fox in action yet again this week on WWE Superstars. Should be good recapping with her 63539656016594th third match in recent memory with Paige.

And with that, stay tuned, Jack will be back!

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