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WWE Superstars Redux (February 21st, 2013): The Funkadactyls Face-off Against a Reunited Salt & Cracked Black Pepper

Superstars Funk vs Salt

What’s up Diva fans and welcome to the WWE Superstars Redux, the second one in two weeks! This week, the twelve people who watch this show have got the treat of a tag team match featuring four fan favorites. The Funkadactyls, Cameron and Naomi will be going up against Alicia Fox and Natalya, the glorious team that Booker T once called “Salt & Cracked Black Pepper”! Make of that what you will, as I still don’t have a clue what he meant by it, but nevertheless, the team with more face/heel turns than Kane are back together, and they’ll be hoping that the veterans can easily dispose of the rookies. Which duo will win and and who will take the pin? How will Cameron handle being in the ring with one of the stars of her all-time favorite match, Alicia Fox? It’s time to find out!

I hear some funky music and as this is Diva Dirt, I think we all know what this means… NAOMI! Oh, and Cameron. But still, Naomi! Both girls are looking blazing in blue (a bit of paradoxical writing for you there!) and both are of course, accompanied by the ruler of Planet Funk, Mr. Brodus Clay. The Momma’s of the world have seemingly all been informed of this match as the music ends the sound of a screeching guitar, which can only mean one thing, Natalya! Nattie is joined by Alicia Fox and the girls are looking beautiful in black! Both teams are looking good and we know that they can deliver the goods, so who’s coming out on top?

The match starts with Natalya mocking Cameron’s funky moves, before both girls lock horns with a collar and elbow tie-up (call that Tony Dawson!). Following a wristlock and some funny trash talking from Natalya (she calls that weird waving thing she does with Khali dancing?), Cameron flips herself out of harms way, before applying a wristlock of her own – very nice! Natalya reverses the momentum again and executes another wristlock, before converting it into a headlock. Cameron pushed Tal off but it’s to no avail, as the Dungeon Diva knocks one of the followers of funk to the floor with a shoulder block.

More mockery ensues from Natalya, who runs off the ropes before flipping over Cameron. The former Tough Enough contestant then leapfrogs Natalya before showing off an excellent wheelbarrow armdrag! Cameron continues to impress with a monkey flip but she lets her good offensive display go to her head and starts dancing, and this is a definite opening for Nattie. The Calgary native knees Cameron in the gut before whipping her off the ropes. As Cameron runs the aforementioned ropes, Alicia Fox taps her head and this has the fiery Cameron reeling. The distraction from the Devious Ms. Fox pays off however as Cameron walks into a stiff clothesline from Tal.

Natalya stroppily sits on Cameron for just a one count before tagging in Alicia. OH MY GOD, CAMERON IS FACING ALICIA!! I’m sure Cameron is closer to flat-lining than I am, but wow, what an epic moment! Hyperbole over, Alicia spanks Cameron (she’s going easy on her because of the Tough Enough endorsement) before showing that actually, she’s here to play hard, and she proves this by repeatedly sending Cameron head first into the turnbuckles. The first ever African-American Divas Champion then uses one of her patented moves, the northern lights suplex, yet she only manages a two-count. Alicia now tries to knock the wind out of Cameron with a headlock as Brodus Clay tries to get the fans behind ‘Cammy’ as he calls her. Hooray, I have a new synonym for her! Cammy manages to get to a vertical base but the long-legged Lolita (blame Matt Striker for that one) shoves her opponent back down and get a count of one.

Alicia then tags in Natalya whom hoists Cameron up for a modified airplane spin. Cameron drops behind Nattie but it’s to no avail, as the daughter of Jim ‘The Anvil’ Neidhart maintains her authoritative grasp over her foe. Alicia is tagged back in once again and things start to get slightly awkward as Cameron starts to fight out. Foxy pushes Cameron off the ropes and Cameron thrusts her idol to the ground, which could signal a tag to Naomi for the first time in the match. I was right (I hadn’t already watched the match or anything) and here comes Naomi!

The NXT Season 3 runner-up is fresher than a daisy as she brutalizes Alicia with a flurry of elbow strikes. The funky high-flyer then leapfrogs Alicia before hitting her stunning standing hurricanrana on Alicia, and Foxy sells it like a pro. Naomi then butt bumps Alicia right in the mush (better than Layla‘s jovial kind) before celebrating her work by busting some moves. Naomi then runs at Alicia in the corner, but the Foxy Floridian sunset flips her way out of danger, for about a millisecond. Alicia’s momentum from the pin attempt is thwarted as Naomi grabs the middle rope and then drops all her weight on Alicia, Rikishi-style… without her bottom being naked… and without all the stretch marks.

Moving swiftly on, Naomi corkscrew elbows Alicia from off of the second rope before Natalya breaks up the pin attempt. Cameron then re-asserts herself into the match but Lou Thesz pressing Nattie out to the arena floor. Screams can be heard from the outside as Alicia whips Naomi into the corner, which the latter counters by rolling over the top rope. Alicia charges as Naomi but she flies right into an elbow. Speaking of flying, Naomi then hits a Springboard Crossbody, for the pin and the win!

Thoughts: Naomi is so bloody impressive. Her balance and fluidity in the ring are second to none and I am so, so glad that she is finally being able to show what she can do in the ring. It’s been a long time coming and I’m happy that she is getting quite a few matches under her belt before she is thrust into the main spotlight in the division. Cameron also impressed me, and although her stamina seemed to slip later on, she still showed me a valiant effort. Alicia was her usual self by selling moves like it was going out of fashion and Natalya, well, a bad word can’t be uttered about her! Her sarcasm was pretty funny and I love how vocal she gets in the ring. Overall, a stellar showing from all four ladies, and a glimpse into the Divas Championship scene come six months time? And with that, stay tuned, Jack will be back!

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